You Are Who You Chose To Become

Is there a difference between the person that you are and the person that you would like to be?

The person that i am is an observer. I'm the one in the background giving comments at all that's happening to the protagonist. Others would laugh and join along with me in the otherwise ruthless comments. Sometimes i'm the person people would call if they need company to do something crazy. I'm the shoulder they cry on when life treats them bad. I'm the person they trust with all their secrets. I'm the person who gets to know all the gossip. Others are the people that things happen to. I'm the one who's there to listen to all these happenings. Sometimes come up with solutions to their problems, sometimes laugh along with them, sometimes cry along with them. That's me to others. 

Sam Walter Foss wrote in his poem- House By The Side Of The Road that he wants to be this person. He would want to be the person by the side of the road who likes to see the race of men go by and be there for them, no matter if they are bad or good, weak or strong, wise or foolish, he wants to be there for them, because he himself is all that too. As much as I can relate to this and as much as I agree with this, it does hurt sometimes that your not the protagonist. 

Secretly, I wish I could be that. The person that needs a shoulder to cry on, the person with crazy ideas, the person others could find amusement by making fun of. The person with secrets. Or quiet simply the, person that things happen to. 

In all my years of socializing I have tried to become the protagonist in a crowd. And it worked. For a brief period of time I did become this person. And the irony is that I didn't like it. I was not a fan of the attention and i somehow felt, for the lack of a better word, exposed. I had decided then that i'm happy being the girl the the background. And for a long period of time I was happy.

But lately the question began to taunt me again. I guess i just needed to be reminded why I chose to become who I am. Ah! surprisingly i'm happy again. So to answer the question- Yes. There is a difference. But it should not matter, because the person that you should be is the person you are when your happy.